We went grocery shopping last night with the kids. It was a terrible experience. Adan threw the biggest tantrum ever and wouldn’t stop crying. To top it off, Christy started crying because Adan was crying. Then Edward got cranky because people were looking at us. It was just such a big mess. I couldn’t wait to get out of there. 

It all started with those special carts for kids. You know which one, right? The one that has 2 seats for the kids? Well, at first the kids seemed excited about it. After a while, Adan wanted to get down, so Edward let him down. Of course, he wasn’t satisfied and wanted to keep going up and down. I got upset because I knew it was a matter of time before he hurt himself (which he did). Then Christy wanted to get down too. Adan was crying and crying and I was trying so hard to keep him calm. I took him to the restroom, got down to his level and told him he needed to stop crying and that he was going to behave. He seemed to have understood. We get back with Edward and Christy and I sit Adan back down with Christy. Next thing you know, Christy was mad and she grabbed Adan’s face with her hands, like she was pinching his face hard, and he started screaming and crying. Edward gave me a dirty look and started talking between his teeth (which I ABSOLUTELY hate) and he grabbed Adan and comforted him. I was beyond upset by that point. When we got in the car, I couldn’t even talk with how mad I was. 

I was mad not only that Adan had thrown a huge tantrum, but that Edward had given me that look like it was all my fault, and that he did it in front of people. 

So that was what prompted our argument. I was mad at him about that. Then, he got a call to help a customer that was locked out of their RV and started bitching about it. I told him, “It’s annoying that you make it seem like it’s such a pain in your ass to provide for this family.” And he was like, “Yea it is.” And that really really upset me because he was the one that proposed to me. He was the one that wanted to have babies with me. And now he’s complaining about working to pay the bills???

I compare him to my dad in my head and I loved how my dad loved to provide for us. He loved making sure we had everything we needed. 

Edward is a 24 hour locksmith, so he can get a call at any time of the day. I understand it’s normal to be frustrated sometimes, but he is ALWAYS annoyed when he gets a call. He told me the other day, “It’s not my fault these people are stupid and locked themselves out.” I tell him, “Yea, well if these people weren’t ‘stupid’ then you wouldn’t even have a job.” 

He was telling me yesterday he wants to quit and become a truck driver. I told him I didn’t think it was a good idea because he’s going to hate it eventually like he hates all of his jobs.

I just honestly can’t stand him right now. I can’t stand his face or his voice. I mean, what kind of man bitches like that all of the time? I know sometimes i would rather be anywhere but here at the office, but I know we need my paycheck to pay for stuff so I mostly do it happily. I drag myself out of bed, get dressed, and do a 40-minute round trip every day to provide with what I can. 

Why can’t he be the same?

He will never change, will he?

About christyrendon

I'm a 26 year old working mom of two amazing kids, Adan (2 1/2) and Christy (1).. I've been married for 3 years to Edward..

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